The John Report: The Raw Deal for July 13/09
[Previous Article] - [Next Article]|
The Deal on…a couple of different things - The Jericho/Mysterio match from last week's Smackdown was the best TV match in WWE this year. I'd say their match at the last PPV (Extreme Rules) was better because it was a faster paced match, but this one was a lot of fun too at about 25 minutes in length. Hell of a good match that I assume is the "last" one in this series. People should go out of their way to watch this one. I give it ****1/4 after the initial viewing. This has been the feud of the year so far. No question about it. - Another Jericho thing that I love (can you tell he's my favorite or what?) is his ongoing Twitter banter with The Miz. It's more like a destruction of the Miz, but I'll give Miz some credit for some decent ones. It's just that most of Jericho's lines are epic while Miz seems like he's trying too hard while failing miserably most of the time. Hopefully they take it on air with Miz being Jericho's new partner where they can insult eachother in the ring. I'm anti-Twitter, by the way, but Jericho owning Miz is great. - They changed the name of Cyber Sunday again. Now the name is Bragging Rights. I guess at Bragging Rights the winner of the title matches will have the bragging rights over their opponent. I can picture the bad jokes by the writing team in my head already. It's not a good name, but it's better than Annihilation. - Jim Ross mentioned in a recent blog that Shawn Michaels is likely to be back in the ring by late August, maybe for Summerslam, while the Undertaker would be back in September. Michaels is my all time favorite wrestler, so I'm very excited about his return. Get him back in the main event picture and throw the title on him right away. He deserves one more run. As for Undertaker, I'm really looking forward to a feud with Chris Jericho because it's never been done before and Jericho's track record in the past 18 months in terms of great feuds is the best in the business. Just please don't give us Undertaker vs. Kane or Undertaker vs. Khali. I don't need to see those ever again. - Some thoughts on UFC 100 because I loved it and I'm sure some people reading this watched it too. If you didn't watch or you don't care about UFC just skip these next two paragraphs for the Raw Deal. I'm such a fan of Lesnar. I go crazy rooting for him when he fights. I don't know what it is, but I just enjoy watching him perform so much. I guess it's a man-crush. Brock dominated like I thought and played the heel so well. He destroyed Mir even more than I thought he would. The post fight interview was hilarious. GSP schooled Alves although I wish GSP would wear shorts. It's not fun watching him fight on a 55 inch HD TV. Put your junk in some trunks, Georges. Somebody wake up Bisping. One of the most definitive knockouts I've ever seen although it wasn't that surprising since it felt like Bisping was going to walk into a right hand the entire fight with the way he was standing. I have no problem with Lesnar being "unsportsmanlike" or whatever label you want to call his behavior after the fight. I don't like fighters always touching gloves. It's a fight. Some of these guys don't like eachother. Yes it's a sport and yes there's a lot of respect that should be there during the fight, but let's not forget how much junk Mir was talking. He was cocky in every single interview he had. Lesnar had every right to be a jerk to him because Mir was a jerk to him first. If somebody treats you with respect you should give it back. However, if somebody treats you with disrespect then by all means be the biggest asshole you can be to them. They deserve it. Mir deserved it. Lesnar wiped the stupid grin off Mir's face and I, for one, loved it. To the people bitching about it I say stop being so soft. It's a man's sport. Be a man. Where's Randy Savage to sing when you need him? Live from Orlando, Florida here's the Raw Deal… This Week's GM is...Seth Green Triple H McMahon brought him out and they proceeded to talk about the Robot Chicken show. They showed a clip. I laughed a bit. The announcers laughed as if it was funnier than Borat or Seinfeld. You have to love the ridiculousness of a man in his 60s like Jerry Lawler talking about the greatness of Robot Chicken. Orton came out, Hunter wanted to wrestle him in singles, but Green had another idea, which was to put Orton, Rhodes and Dibiase against the team of Cena, Hunter and himself. That was a nice twist. He came off well in the segment as the tiny, nerdy guy and left me surprisingly optimistic about the rest of the night. Maryse, Alicia Fox and Rosa Mendez d. Mickie James, Gail Kim and Kelly Kelly in a summer swimsuit spectacular (1/4*) Jericho told Seth he's a big star and Seth didn't go out of his way to accommodate him, which was a mistake. Jericho had an agenda and felt like he had something to say. I know he's one half of the tag champs, which means he can be on all shows wrestling, but does that mean he can also be on all shows doing angles? I guess so. The Miz d. Primo (1/2*) I'm glad that they didn't go with an angle to explain Edge's injury. It's wrestling. Injuries are a part of the business. I hope he heals up and is back for WrestleMania. We get a clip of Hornswoggle beating Chavo on Superstars. That actually happened? Poor Chavo. He should go back to being Kerwin White if that's the best booking they can do for him. Anyway, Horny talked to Seth, who made a rematch of that Superstars match and then Big Show walked in to do his "one million dollars" impression as Dr. Evil. I chuckled just a bit. I miss Show doing comedy. His Hogan impression at Backlash 2000 is one of the funniest things ever in WWE history. Look it up. Jack Swagger d. MVP (*1/4) I like how they show footage of Edge's injury. It tells the audience it's a real injury unlike all the bullshit ones that happened when Orton kicked somebody in the head. Jericho talks, then has a match…we think? (1/4*) Hornswoggle d. Chavo with one arm tied behind his back (DUD) Randy Orton told the Legacy boys to leave Seth Green to him. Also during this Cody said that his dad Dusty Rhodes might be GM of Raw next week, which didn't end up happening. Oh well. Dusty will definitely work well in the role in the future. Big Show d. Evan Bourne like a bug (1/4*) This is all building to Big Show vs. Hornswoggle at WrestleMania 26. Match of the year! (I immediately regret typing it because somebody from WWE could be reading this and could suggest it to Vince, who obviously will love it. If it happens blame me. I can take it.) Here's a clip of Robot Chicken. Jerry Lawler and Michael Cole with their big fake laughs think it's hilarious, so I'm going to go buy it! No. Comedy time with Santino playing with action figures in front of Seth, who looked freaked out. Hunter McMahon and Cena came in to talk strategy. Seth was actually funny in pointing out he was only 5'4" and getting a little help from the inhaler to get ready for the match. Then Hunter and Cena argued just a bit about who will protect the midget on their team. I guess that's promoting Night of Champions, but I don't know. Next week's GM(s) on Raw: ZZ Top. Wow. Nothing says catering to kids, teens and men in the 18-34 age group like a couple of 60 year olds with funny looking beards. I'm sure Vince loves it, though. That's what matters. Apparently 12 Rounds with John Cena is the #1 DVD in America. I haven't seen it. Maybe I will on cable in a few years. I've yet to see any WWE produced films. I really don't think I'm missing much. Seth Green, Triple H & John Cena wrestled Randy Orton, Cody Rhodes & Ted Dibiase to a double DQ (**) Three Stars of the Show In Closing… The idea that Mark Henry is the third biggest babyface (in terms of pushes he seems to be) on Raw right now really bugs me. He's not the answer. Not even close. He's also much better in the heel role because why should fans feel sympathy for a guy bigger and stronger than everybody else? And what intangible does he have (other than his size) that MVP doesn’t have to warrant such a push? I’ve never understood the thinking that a guy has to lose for years before you push them especially when you need new main event level talent. Rating: 4.5 (out of 10) It’s a slightly below average show this week because none of the matches left any kind of impression on me while they didn’t do a great job in promoting Night of Champions in a couple of weeks. ------ I appreciate any feedback you guys can give so please send me your thoughts at oratoryjohn@gmail.com about anything related to WWE past or present. If you add me on facebook (just head to Facebook.com/thejohnreport) you'll see the links to my columns as well because I post them there just as soon as I post them on this website. It's an account that I use only for my wrestling columns rather than a personal one. It’s also a way to chat with me because I have chatted with a number of different people on there in recent weeks. Give me a shout. I’ve been too busy lately to write more than once a week, but I do have some other stuff on the horizon (I appreciate the column suggestions) including the return of For Love or Money and that Survivor Series ’97 review that I’ve been too lazy to write. Hopefully I can get something posted for you guys to read at the end of the week. If not, I’ll be back with the next Raw Deal on Tuesday like usual. Next week: ZZ Top. I'm already growing my beard out in their honor. Smell ya later, Visit My Archives to view ten years of The John Report columns. |


